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World Mental Health Day

I find it funny that world mental health day is in October. October has grown to have such a significant meaning to me.
I realised the other day that as each and every October passes, I have been victorious. I can sit back and smile, because depression hasn't won. I have.

What is she rambling on about?
I was going to kill myself in October. That was my suicide date. October.
October two years ago.
I really thought, that October, that my time was up. I didn't need more time, I didn't want more time, I would've happily given my time away.
Now I clutch onto time, clutch it close to my heart.
My time. My life. I want nothing but time, I want to see the world, its good, its bad, its unusual and its beauty.
I want to live.
I've never really said that, but since that October, I've grown to want to live.

When you feel that way, time isn't important, time isn't valuable.
That's what the mental monsters tell you.
But time is precious and if you pull through you will find that it's the greatest thing on this earth.

Find the time to talk. Find the time to live with yourself. Find the time to learn to appreciate life again. It'll come. Maybe not now. Maybe not for a year. It'll come, and it'll go. But you'll feel ok. You'll have your passing October's, your victories. And you will love time.

#WorldMentalHealthDay

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