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Medication

I have always been the one who advocates for medication for mental health and its usefullness, but what happens when your medication doesn't work for you anymore?
That is what had been happening to me recently (hence the complete lack of a schedule on this blog). I had been dealing with it until a point, until depression hit me hard, and for more than a couple of days this time. I had avoided going to the doctor because I didn't want to go back to switching between medications all the time, incase they made everything worse. When I was eventually forced to go, only my contraceptive pill was changed, at first. The doctor told me that she never would take me off my medcation, and for that, I was relieved. So many people ask when I'm coming off it, or are surprised when I'm still on it. People don't seem to realise that disorders and illnesses don't just go away (I wish they did, though).
As I changed contraceptive pill, the low feeling of depression went away, but numbness set in. It was so severe that even the arrival of my boyfriend didn't change anything, and that was when I knew something was seriously wrong. I called the doctor, and she doubled my current dose of medication. This was all only a few days ago and already I feel better.
My point with all of this is to not be afraid to visit your doctor. To not be afraid of changing medication. As my doctor said, sometimes your body can just react badly to something, even if you've been taking it for years, or you can outgrow your dosage. Feeling unable to function, feeling as if death is a prefarable option, feeling numb, feeling not real. None of this is how life should be. Any change can be scary, but it's better than feeling awful.



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