Becoming triggered is a joke these days. In a meme I had hoped had died down, I see it revived constantly. It is to the point where people like myself, who have triggers, feel ridiculous for using the word. I struggled to get the words, "It triggered me" out of my mouth last week.
But I was triggered, and I was triggered badly. I won't get into why and how, because that is a long and personal story. But it caused my first panic attack in months.
Being triggered doesn't look like someone who is mildly uncomfortable. It doesn't look like someone who is mildly offended. It doesn't look like someone who is mildly agitated. For me, it looked like a person who couldn't breathe. Who couldn't move for over thirty minutes. Someone who hyperventilated and stayed in bed for hours because they were too scared to move. Someone who looked like this, even though this photo was taken hours after having a panic attack due to a trigger.
But I was triggered, and I was triggered badly. I won't get into why and how, because that is a long and personal story. But it caused my first panic attack in months.
Being triggered doesn't look like someone who is mildly uncomfortable. It doesn't look like someone who is mildly offended. It doesn't look like someone who is mildly agitated. For me, it looked like a person who couldn't breathe. Who couldn't move for over thirty minutes. Someone who hyperventilated and stayed in bed for hours because they were too scared to move. Someone who looked like this, even though this photo was taken hours after having a panic attack due to a trigger.
It's exhausting. I had a final exam the day after. I was tired, I was teary, I couldn't think straight, and I was completely spaced out and out of body. I am currently hoping that I didn't fail because of.
This reaction is not meme worthy. It makes the whole experience harder when people don't understand. People tell me that I'm being ridiculous, to get over myself. People on the internet would tell me I'm overreacting. Or, if idiots like Pierce Morgan would tell me to get over it, to man up.
Do people not realise how damaging that is? I hid from the people I was with at the time because I knew they wouldn't understand. My parents had to drive for two hours to make sure I was ok.
This, my friends, is not something that is amusing. It's not a meme. It's not fair that something I and so many others deal with is being trivialised to the point we can't use the terminology that explains what is wrong.
I wish I could say more. On one hand, I'm still recovering from my panic attack that was only days ago, and I'm so tired. On the other hand, this is such a simple concept that I don't see how it isn't common sense, and can't find much to say. People don't seem to respect what they don't understand, and ignorance seems to be ok these days.
I can't say much other than it sucks. Please don't do it.
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Welp, my first post in a month. Apologies, I had the maximum amount of exams possible in my semester finals. More regular posts will be returning though!
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