justaoifethings

"It is an evil entity, but it only fights for its own survival" No one could really say that's wrong, as that's what we all do. But when a survival method becomes destructive, it's hated and loathed. 'Becky'. It seems like such a trivial name to give something so dark. They say giving something a name gives it power, and that's why I held off. But when a name was give, the power was thrown onto me. I didn't feel so weak anymore. I was able to take control. Then 'Becky' wasn't such a dark entity anymore. She was still strong, capable of corrupting my mind, taking over my body, paralyzing me. But I had grasped some control. I was determined to fight for my own survival, as 'Becky' had fought for hers. She had fought long and hard and was no stranger to overkill, but with the simple naming of 'It', I was finally ready to retake myself, to retake my mind. When that fear is lost, I became more powerful than anything ...

Going through life, I have discovered, for me, the two worst feelings in the world. I had to be tortured with one of them again today. The other, I'm sure, will come up at a later time. I am in an ldr, short for long distance relationship, and have been for almost two years. I'll keep his name to myself. He's Dutch. I'm Irish. There's the U.K, a couple of seas and expensive plane tickets between us. He's a special human. Said every person in love before me, yes, but he's different. Very different. Nearly two years ago, I was struggling against a loosing fight with my mental health. I had gone downhill at a scary pace, and my mind had been corrupted with depression and tormented with chronic anxiety. By chance, I met a Dutch boy online, thanks to my best friend, her boredom, and Omegle. I'll never know what compelled me, but I told him everything in my brain, things I hadn't told anyone else. Most importantly, I told him I wanted to die. I wasn...