justaoifethings

I feel as if I only wrote about a suicide, and here I am again, writing about another. It's devastating. Tears are in my eyes, and I did not know Cathriona. But her loss of life tugs at my heart. The fact she took her own life pummels it. I feel like I'm lost for words. Like Daniel Kyre and all the other people before her that committed suicide, they have done something irreversible. They have scarred their family and friends, most likely unintentionally. I can never say this enough, Depression corrupts the mind. Depression feeds you lies. Talk to people if you feel ending your life is a good option. Depression wants you to do this. It makes you feel it's right. But trust me, it is not. Cathriona is another light extinguished by her own hands. She isn't the first. And gut wrenchingly, she won't be the last. Right now, unimaginable amounts of people are contemplating suicide. People have killed themselves today, and just because they weren't in the ne...

Daniel Kyre was a part of a youtube group called Cyndago. Daniel Kyre is dead. Daniel Kyre tried to kill himself. I didn't know who Daniel Kyre was. I didn't know who Cyndago was. I had never watched their videos. I had never heard their names. But my heart grew heavy as I read what happened to him, and I can't imagine the pain his friends and family are going through. Daniel Kyre was a friend. Daniel Kyre was a son. Daniel Kyre was a brother. Daniel Kyre was a smile for hundreds of thousands of people who didn't personally know him. Daniel Kyre was depressed. Daniel Kyre had enough. Daniel Kyre didn't get the help he needed. Daniel Kyre did something irreversible. Daniel Kyre has impacted so many lives in a way I doubt he thought was possible. His father is heartbroken. His sister is heartbroken. His friends are heartbroken. Their lives won't ever be the same. Little things will remind them of Daniel. Daniel won't ever leave them, and ...

For the past year and a half, I've been recovering from depression. Recovery was always a goal for me, as it is for most struggling with mental health. But what I didn't realise what would happen when I started to recover. In my head, it would go from cruel darkness to pure joy and happiness overnight. Of course, unrealistic, but your mind is compromised when riddled with depression. Going through recovery, I realised I had lost my identity. I was no longer the mentally ill girl, depression the focus of my life. So who was I? Who was I before depression ate away with me? And I realised with horror, that I didn't know. I had been diagnosed with depression about six or seven months before starting to feel like I was recovering, after suffering for a long time. I had been suicidal and my GAD and panic attacks had begun to spin out of control, hence my diagnosis. But depression does not begin or end with diagnosis. I tried to recall the start of my depression, but still ...