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How Modelling Helped My Mental Health

I've always been advised to stay away from modelling. With my anxiety, people were sure that my body issues would become worse and develop into a disorder. This was so much so that I've rejected an offer from an agency before. Though, this year, the UCD fashion show was in aid of a mental health charity, so I decided to audition, and to my surprise, was given a place.
It turns out, that modelling in this environment, is extremely healthy. There was a huge diversity of races, ethnicities, sexualities, body types and personalities. Never once did I feel inferior to anyone else, or that anyone was more or less beautiful than I was.
The organisers were lovely and so encouraging (shout out to Jenny and Baker). It was a rare instance that I felt that I can, rather than I can't. Their manner of constructive criticism was perfect, that my chronic anxiety didn't take it the wrong way.
For once, I felt OK about doing something extracurricular. During my secondary school career, I never did anything but work. I was always far too anxious and depressed. For once, I was excited to spend my time in something else, and was comfortable. I was made feel confident about my appearance and my abilities.
I was also placed in the most amazing group, and, surprisingly to me, I made friends. This is something I always found near impossible, but for people to like me was bizarre but welcome, and again, confidence enducing. The support group we have created is something I am currently treasuring and hoping that I won't lose.
For something I thought might be detrimental to my mental health, it did quite the opposite. Quite simply, it made me happy. Going into depth, it taught me a lot to have self-love and to not put myself down so quickly. It showed me that I can, rather than I can't, especially also after just speaking in front of two crowds of three thousand for Cycle Against Suicide. It taught me that all bodies are beautiful, even mine. It taught me that everyone has insecurities. It taught me not to be judgemental. It taught me that taking pride in your appearance because you enjoy doing so isn't vain. It proved to myself that I can make commitments. It showed me that not everybody is bad. It showed me that even with anxiety and depression, I can do cool shit.








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Sorry for being MIA - I was doing this awesome show (that was in aid of Jigsaw)
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